Mother, Mom, Mama, Mummy, Ma
Long-term. Team players needed, for challenging permanent work in an often chaotic environment. Candidates must possess excellent communication and organizational skills and be willing to work variable hours, which will include evenings and weekends and frequent 24 hour shifts on call. Some overnight travel required, including trips to primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in far away cities. Travel expenses not reimbursed. Extensive courier duties also required.
The rest of your life:
POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT & PROMOTION:
None. Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills, so that those in your charge can ultimately surpass you
None required. On-the-job training offered on a continually exhausting basis.
WAGES AND COMPENSATION:
Reverse Salary Scheme: Includes frequent raises and bonuses.
A balloon payment is due when they turn 18 because of the assumption that college will help them become financially independent.
When you die, you give them whatever is left.
The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that you actually enjoy it and wish you could only do more.
No dental insurance
No tuition reimbursement
No paid holidays
No stock options are offered
Limitless opportunities for personal growth
Free hugs for life
A new title GRAND MOTHER and it starts all over again.